[ti:Language of the Olympic Games, Part 2]
[al:Everyday Grammar]
[ar:VOA]
[dt:2024-07-19]
[by:www.voase.cn]
[00:00.00]In a recent Everyday Grammar lesson, we explored some language used to talk about the Olympic Games - the words host, compete, and expect.
[00:14.32]We invited listeners to answer our report with their own writing about the Olympics using those words.
[00:22.89]Many VOA Learning English fans sent messages.
[00:27.86]Today, we will give feedback on two of the messages that we received.
[00:35.14]Let's begin with a message written to us by Fernando from Columbia.
[00:41.15]Here is part of what he wrote. Please note: "that time" refers to the Tokyo Olympics, scheduled for 2020 but held in 2021.
[00:56.54]...By that time Paris, the France's capital was announced to be hosting the competitors to the 2024 (Olympic) games.
[01:08.52]During the competition in Paris people around the world expect to watch a great competition where it will be broken many records; competitors will expect to be well hosted, and Paris expect to be the best host.
[01:29.26]Fernando's message is clear and understandable, but we have a few suggestions that might help improve the writing.
[01:39.97]In the first sentence, remove the article "the." 
[01:44.42]Instead of saying "Paris, the France's capital," we say "Paris, France's capital."
[01:53.98]We do not need the article because the possessive, "France's," already gives us the exactness we need to know about what is being talked about.
[02:06.16]We might also say "Paris, the capital of France," or simply "Paris, France."
[02:14.71]Overall, the first sentence has a passive structure.
[02:20.13]It might be better to change the sentence to the active voice. 
[02:25.54]The active voice will make the sentence's meaning clearer.
[02:30.97]So, we might say this:
[02:33.15]"By that time, the International Olympic Committee had announced that Paris, France, would host the 2024 Olympic Games."
[02:44.80]Our first suggestion for Fernando's second sentence involves articles.
[02:51.80]Instead of saying, "expect to watch a great competition," we might remove the article "a" and say "expect to watch great competitions." 
[03:05.18]This makes more sense because the Olympics includes many different sports events.
[03:12.14]We might also remove the pronoun "it" and slightly change the word order to something like this:
[03:20.78]During the Olympic Games, people around the world expect to watch great competitions where many records will be broken.
[03:30.35]Now let's turn to part of a message from Eleni. 
[03:35.53]Eleni is from Greece. She wrote to us about the creation of the Olympic Games.
[03:44.40]The first Olympic Games were held in Greece every four years since 776 BC.
[03:52.54]The host town was the ancient Olympia. 
[03:56.30]The Olympic Games were dedicated to Zeus, the Supreme God of the Greek religion.
[04:03.11]During the Olympic Games no wars were permitted.
[04:08.60]On arrival, all athletes swore to compete with honor and respect. 
[04:13.68]There were a few completions such as foot-race, wrestling, pentathlon, horse races, pankration- a mix of boxing and wrestling and the athletes competed naked probably for complete freedom of the movement.
[04:32.46]Each city expected its own athletes to win in the Olympic Games.
[04:38.12]When that happened they were tearing down a part of the city walls to honor him. 
[04:43.81]It meant that the city was protected by such great athletes...
[04:49.56]Eleni's message was excellent. 
[04:52.90]We have a few suggestions, beginning with the words "On arrival..."
[04:58.82]We suggest creating an introductory clause and changing some of the wording to make the sentence clearer in meaning. 
[05:08.42]We could rewrite it this way:
[05:11.15]"When athletes arrived at Olympia, they swore to compete with honor and respect."
[05:18.48]We also suggest checking the spelling of a few words - "completion" should be replaced with competition, for example. 
[05:28.43]And, we think adding punctuation, such as commas, might help make the message clearer.
[05:35.47]Our final suggestion is for the second-to-last sentence.
[05:41.40]Eleni uses the pronoun "they." 
[05:44.42]But, who "they" are is not clear. Does "they" describe city officials, townspeople, fellow athletes?
[05:54.03]We might also use a different verb form - "tore down" instead of "were tearing down," as in this example:
[06:04.00]When a city's athlete won a competition, the townspeople tore down part of the city walls to honor him.
[06:13.21]All of the messages we received were excellent.
[06:17.81]In terms of grammar, our main feedback is to pay careful attention to articles, to use active voice more often, and to clarify pronouns.
[06:29.70]That is, make sure that the pronoun very clearly refers to an exact noun.
[06:36.89]We hope that all of you get to enjoy the Olympic Games.
[06:41.60]And we thank all our listeners who sent us messages about the international event.
[06:49.57]I'm John Russell.